Before September 26th of last year, I was blissfully unaware of what experiencing pregnancy loss was like. When we learned that we were pregnant with what we thought was our miracle baby, miscarriage was a possibility but I thought that there was no way I would experience infertility and pregnancy loss. That just seemed unfair.<\/p>\n
At that point in our journey, I couldn\u2019t imagine losing that life.<\/p>\n
Our nightmare became a reality at our first ultrasound where we learned that our baby did not have a heartbeat and did not appear to be growing at the rate that it should. This appointment was the first time that the word miscarriage was said out loud by our doctor.<\/p>\n
He gave me the dreaded three options and we went home to grieve the loss of the life that we had dreamt of for so long.<\/p>\n
That was the first time that I experienced pregnancy loss and it was traumatic, laboring, and everything I didn\u2019t think it would be. I was very unprepared for my first miscarriage because it happened naturally in the middle of the night, the night before our scheduled D&C.<\/p>\n
It felt like the universe was very much against us at that point.<\/p>\n
That experience taught me how I could better prepare myself and others for pregnancy loss because I was told to \u201cexpect a heavy period\u201d and that couldn\u2019t have been farther from the truth in my case.<\/p>\n
Four months later, we were pregnant again! This time from a medicated and monitored cycle at our fertility clinic. The odds were literally in our favor to not miscarry a second time however during the first ultrasound we were given the same news. This time I chose to take the medication at home and it ended with an emergency trip to the hospital for a D&C.<\/p>\n
While going through miscarriage twice has truly been the worst thing that has happened to us so far in our journey together, I did learn a lot from it and try to use those lessons to help others. Here are five things I learned in the process:<\/p>\n
I learned that in the medical field, a miscarriage is often referred to as a spontaneous abortion. If you aren\u2019t prepared for those words on your medical bills and other related documents, it can be very hard to hear or see.<\/p>\n
Even though that is the technical term, most medical professionals will strictly use the word miscarriage when discussing the loss with their patients. You won\u2019t be able to escape seeing those words on a medical bill or record so make sure you are prepared for that.<\/p>\n
I learned that adult diapers are an actual lifesaver after a miscarriage. People might laugh when they read this but they were the only thing that made me comfortable while sleeping and that gave me some sort of comfort when I returned to work.<\/p>\n
After a miscarriage, some women tend to bleed for days or weeks. In my case, I bled a little over two weeks each time, so the adult diapers came in handy! Going back to work was really difficult because I felt like everyone was looking at me. I didn\u2019t feel confident in a maxi pad so I wore an adult diaper and have no shame about that.<\/p>\n